About
Iza IJzerman is a multidisciplinary artist and writer whose work explores queerness, grief, and the quiet absurdities of being alive. With a background in psychology and a deep pull toward storytelling in all forms, she moves fluidly between mediums, writing fiction, composing music, and working behind the scenes in film.
She was the production coordinator for the feature film The Dadchelor, still models internationally, and writes songs that feel like the emotional aftermath of a conversation you almost had.
Her debut novel, The Chaos We Create, began as a series of voice notes about comphet, overthinking, and the queerness she spent years trying to explain away. What started as a private unraveling became a deeply personal story about becoming, late, loud, and full of feeling.
The Chaos We Create
The Chaos We Create
The Chaos We Create
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A quietly wild novel about queerness, grief, late bloomings, and all the messy, beautiful thoughts we pretend not to have.
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You know when your life looks normal from the outside,
but inside, you’re quietly screaming into a decorative pillow?
Scout isn’t falling apart. She’s just… misfiled under the wrong category of person.
She’s new in New York, which sounds like a fresh start but feels more like a ghost tour.
She used to visit the city with her mom, back when she still tried to be someone lovable.
Now her mom is dead, and Scout is too queer to pretend and too scared to fully be.
She’s dating women for the first time.
She’s overthinking every moment.
And somehow, she’s still folding her laundry like it’s going to save her.
The Chaos We Create is for anyone who’s ever looked around and thought:
“This isn’t the life I ordered.”
It’s about awkward kisses, complicated friendships, the long tail of comphet,
and learning to stop apologizing for wanting more.
It’s not a love story, exactly.
But love is in it.
Kind of like a stain you can’t get out, but don’t really want to.
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WHY?
At first, this was just a long voice note to a friend.
A joke, really.
A list of all the weird things I was feeling. Girls I was crushing on.
Stuff that made me cry in public and then pretend it was allergies.
But somewhere in that mess was the version of me I wish I’d had when I was younger.
The baby gay who didn’t have the words yet.
Who dated men because it felt safer than asking the real questions.
Who thought “overthinking” was a personality trait.
So I wrote it down. All of it.
And now it’s a book.
For the late bloomers.
The queer kids who feel like frauds.
The people who want to be held but can’t figure out how to ask.
This is for you.
(And also for me.)
“Like if Normal People and Fleabag got wine-drunk and wrote a love letter to their exes.”
“Iza somehow put my most chaotic inner monologue into a book and made it poetic.”
“This book made me feel less alone in a way that hurt and healed at the same time.”
Until 8-8-2025, only The Netherlands can pre order the book.
